numb, fragile and defenseless...

who's fault is it? is it mine or is it yours? i've been innocently frail and fragile, you broke my defenses, totally naked, completely bare without any form of security and protection. you demolished my already splintered walls and feeble pillars, which I built for me to protect myself from my shortcomings, for me to defend these weaknesses and diseases you carry along with you. you took advantage of the frailness and fissures of these walls, and suddenly get through these barricades without me noticing. you wear a mask of deceit and deceptions, you who made me feel something different, you who almost knew where my weak spots are… as if you were someone who knew me, as if you were someone who were made to annihilate me. you did caught me, you've been always the bait who's waiting to trap and jam all my possessions up – including my self-esteem and compassion. You took advantage of my state of frailty and vulnerability, you've been simple and uncomplicated, you've been what I don't expect, you've been a repeated history, you've been someone I'm still trying to put out of my mind. now I'm confused, it's just that I didn't do something to prevent these deep infiltrations. I let you destroy my defenses, I let you caught me, I let you made me numb and do nothing… now what? what am I going to do? things are now starting to be complicated, the emotions continue to infest my inner ego. now I'm all numb, all yours, surrendering, letting you in control…

what i'm feeling: weak...
current song: learning to breath (switchfoot)